Leg Seeks Rev. Wright’s Analysis of Chris’s Clapping Style, Marching Moves

The Leg has Marching-Envy

Chris and The Leg have been re-listening to Rev. Jeremiah Wright’s speech to the NAACP in hopes of harvesting more of the sage philosopher’s pearls of wisdom and cutting-edge socio-scientific insights on topics like marching bands, baby mobiles, and the funny way white people talk and sing.

“It’s an intellectual, inspirational tour-de-force,” enthused The Leg. “Except for the parts Sen. Obama didn’t like,” it quickly added. “Those were terrible.”

Chris was especially impacted by the Reverend’s theme of “Different is not Deficient.” This has been a transformative revelation for Chris. Why, just last night he shared it with a police officer who had pulled him over for weaving across the center line and driving on the sidewalk.

“My driving is different, not deficient!” he declared as the handcuffs were attached. “Guy probably claps on 1 and 3,” he muttered as he slid into the back seat of the cruiser.

The Leg is now looking forward to riding in elevaators and driving on bridges designed by engineers who don’t feel bound by rigid, “European-American” modes of math and physics. “I want to fly in an airplane built by people who have rejected the imperialistic oppression of ‘right’ answers and the slavery of Western science!” The Leg has declared.

“And you know what, some black stand up comics should pick up on that “white folks do x, but black folks do y’ schtick. It’s hilarious. They could learn to mimic a nerdy white guy’s voice and then contrast it with some hard core urban vulgarity. That stuff would kill. Seriously. Someone should do that.”

Leg, Olby Conflicted as Rev. Jeremiah Wright Sets Black Progress Back 125 Years.

These are times that try Obama Media Cheerleaders’ souls (or in the case of Keith Olbermann, that soul-shaped vacuum adjacent to the lifeless shriveled husk of his sense of shame.)

20 years and 4 months after Jimmy “The Greek” Snyder was fired by CBS and made a national pariah for suggesting that genetic differences between blacks and whites made the former better natural athletes, Jeremiah “The America Damner” Wright confidently asserted that the brains of African-Americans learn differently than the brains of “European-Americans.”

Rev. Wright didn’t favor us with his theories on the brain function of Asian-Americans, Native-Americans, Hispanics or the Australian Aboriginal peoples.

Just when The Leg and his fellow cheerleaders were feeling what they thought was a maximum possible level of awkwardness, Rev. Wright stopped by the National Press Club to share some more pastorly comfort and healing wisdom.

As Olby was heard to say afterwards, “It’s hard out here for an Obama pimp.”