CM’s Leg Declares Limbaugh Quotes: “Fake But Satisfying”

olby

While receiving a deep tissue massage at NBC’s “30 Rock Day Spa and Zen Retreat,” Chris Matthews’ Leg was overheard sleepily musing about Rush Limbaugh’s touchiness about being libeled and slandered.

As the masseuse applied an invigorating lavender-sage exfoliant, The Leg recalled with admiration the Dan Rather/Mary Mapes defense of their fabricating damaging stuff about President George W. Bush . . . “Fake but accurate,” they’d declared.

“Sure these quotes were purely the product of a fevered, conservative-loathing, wikipedia grafitti artist,” The Leg opined. “But that’s irrelevant. The quotes were perfectly consistent with the caricature of Rush we have all worked so hard to create over the last 20 years. Therefore, they were ‘authentic’ in the best, postmodern sense of the word.”

“So, the quotes fit the preferred narrative?” the masseuse piped up, hoping for a tip (for a change.)

“Exactly!” The Leg spasmed. “For all the people that matter, the quotes were fake but satisfying.”

“Fake but delicious,” the masseuse offered as he applied a moisturizing emollient, but the The Leg didn’t respond. It had drifted off to sleep.

{Quote of the day: “People to not believe lies because they have to, but because they want to.”–Malcolm Muggeridge}
Advertisements

Leg Cancels Waxing Appt. to Protest IOC Decision

Chris Matthews’ Leg pretty much went through all five stages of grief (and sort of free-styled a sixth) after hearing the stunning news that the International Olympic Committee had chosen Rio as the site for the 2016 Olympics–thus snubbing Chicago, the cocoon from which President Obama (higher approval ratings be upon Him) emerged like a glorious butterfly just a few short years ago.

“How is this possible?” The Leg sputtered. “The members of the committee experienced the the full soul-healing and psyche-massaging sounds of His voice. In person!”

Still stinging at the injustice of it all, The Leg called and canceled his monthly leg-hair removal session at Brazilian Bob’s Day Spa and Depilatory Hut.