Chris Matthews’ Leg did it’s doughy best to keep a Twitter feed going during the President’s wise and soul-healing address tonight. But Tweety Tweets are tough to produce when you’re vibrating at about 2,000 cycles per second and singing “Oh, sweet mystery of life, at last I’ve found you!”
The only legs more excited than Matthews’ sensitive appendage tonight appeared to belong to Nancy Pelosi who repeatedly demonstrated a vertical leap that should enable her to dunk at will over Dikembe Mutombo.
The Leg loved the way Dear Leader showed he was a young man of fresh ideas by reminding us that politicians have been trying to put those uppity doctors in their place since Teddy Roosevelt. He also thought that having a smirking and grinning Nancy Pelosi seemingly perched on the President’s shoulder in a red dress throughout the address was surely a visually compelling way to reassure all the wavering rubes in flyover country and get them on board with the brilliant plan that’s going to make everything better in every way but not cost anyone any more money.
Sitting on the other shoulder was Joe Biden, who seemed to perk up and lean in when the Shining One said he wanted to address some remarks to senior citizens.
The highlight for the Leg is when the President pointed us all to the Social Security program as a shining example of how the government can run an entitlement program without it becoming a ticking time bomb of exploding deficits and impending national insolvency. (Brilliant!)
Now, surely, the American people will chill out and let those clever folks in Congress do what they do best.
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