The exhiliratory effects of Barack Obama’s voice on The Leg are widely known and fairly well understood. Less well known are the effects images of Hillary Clinton have on the appendage, as Chris Matthews’ Head has not seen fit to reveal that information, but it is assumed the results are not positive.
Nevertheless, it stunned and horrified onlookers when, as a group of MSNBC staff was huddled around a monitor viewing the new Obama Girl video, Chris Matthew’s Leg made a series of sizzling and popping noises and then exploded.
Forensic political scientists, in consultation with Feng Shui practitioners, theorize that the video’s numerous images of Senator Obama interposed with those of Senator Clinton, overlain with a heaping helping of frolicking, T-shirt stretching, and bad singing by Obama Girl, were simply too much for The Leg to process.
This incendiary mixture of positive, frightening and arousing inputs to The Leg resulted in cascading failure at the molecular level. Not to mention a hell of a mess in the MSNBC break room.
As of this writing, a team of college interns were working into the night to gather and reassemble the thousands of splintery fragments of America’s most excitable and liberal limb.
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