“As a body part attached to high-profile figure who takes strong political stands, I want to express my solidarity with Senator Obama’s kahones,” Chris Matthews’ Leg announced today. “I must deplore in the strongest possible terms Rev. Jackson’s ‘hot-mike’ expression of a wish to surgically separate the presidential candidate’s huevos from his [...]
As Barack Obama finally laid claim to the Democratic nomination in his speech the other night, The Leg was vibrating like a tuning fork.
Each soaring, ambiguous platitude took the sensitive appendage to a higher level of harmonic resonance. Each thrilling-though-utterly-undeliverable promise sent electric thrills radiating up the Hardball host’s tibia and femur.
As the speech culminated [...]
In several public places frequented by Obama campaign insiders, Chris Matthews’ Leg has been heard casually but loudly mentioning that it wouldn’t be the least bit offended if the Senator happened to address it as “sweetie.”
“He can also call me Sioux Falls, Sioux City, the 57th state, or a Typical White Person’s Leg if he [...]
These are times that try Obama Media Cheerleaders’ souls (or in the case of Keith Olbermann, that soul-shaped vacuum adjacent to the lifeless shriveled husk of his sense of shame.)
20 years and 4 months after Jimmy “The Greek” Snyder was fired by CBS and made a national pariah for suggesting that genetic differences between blacks [...]
When you’re excited, you get sloppy.
Here, The Head adds a creative classic to the growing list of ways to mispronounce Barack Obama’s name. This one comes off something like, “Baccarat Bok Obama.”
Link here.
Senator Obama’s “Condescension Tour” got off to a rocky start in San Francisco late last week. But The Leg can’t figure out what the rubes in flyover country are all chafe-y and hacked about.
It seems small town Americans are prickly about having their feelings caricatured by hyper-ambitious, Harvard-educated, self-styled Messiahs for the entertainment and ego-massaging [...]
Chris Matthews’ Leg (and the body to which it is attached) threw down the gauntlet yesterday amid galling observations that Keith Olbermann was exhibiting way more over-the-top adoration and gushing school-girl infatuation for candidate Obama than has Matthews.
“I will not be out-fawned by some beady-eyed, over-groomed geek who keeps his Smug knob cranked to ‘11′ [...]
Chris Matthews’ Leg declared Keith Olbermann “right on” when the clearly-baked cable pundit issued the above pronouncement. Olbermann also predicted that Obama would dismantle the Defense Department and replace it with “The Ministry of Harmony and Understanding, Sympathy and Trust Abounding” or HUSTA.
Former Army Paratrooper Donald Clouston, a combat veteran of World War II and Korea, was confronted by a knife-wielding teenage thug near his home in the San Francisco Bay area. The 81-year-old declined the opportunity to hand over his wallet and opted to kick the mugger’s sorry hindquarters instead.
Hot Air has the report.
Chris Matthews’ [...]
When The Leg first heard the conundrumic pronouncement from the Radiant One, he was totally stoked. But the more he pondered it, the more the mood ring on it’s toe drifted toward the colors of bewilderment and irritation. Meanwhile 10th grade girls, stoners of all ages, and Andrew Sullivan still thought it was “totally deep.”
The Leg has looked into the wise and compassionate eyes of Barack Obama and been transformed. Thanks to the Senator of Light, The Leg has shed it’s cynicism and a not-insignificant amount of unsightly hair.
Michelle Malkin has dubbed him “Glowbama.” Hot Air has the goods on the Radiant One’s spiritual mentor and inspiration.
Chris Matthews’ Leg experienced a fleeting tingle of anticipation when network coverage cut away in the middle off Hillary’s unconcession-y concession speech last night in order to carry the Dali Obama’s victory address to a large and rowdy crowd in Houston, Texas. Chris Matthews’ Leg failed to react thereafter, however.
The Leg later complained that Obama tried to get all policy-y [...]
