Chris Matthews’ Leg has been sorely vexed by the major news magazines’ shameful refusal to put Barack Obama’s noble visage on their covers. This scandalous neglect was highlighted in an article on MSNBC today:
Time has featured Obama on its cover 14 times since Jan. 1. Newsweek was close behind, featuring the now-president-elect on 12 of [...]
The Leg Thrilled That Obama Finally Makes the Cover of Time
Chris Matthews’ Leg Flings Shoe at Olbermann’s Head
The sensitive appendage doesn’t recall what put the idea in it’s mind but it was suddenly siezed with an irrestistable urge to kick off a J&M tassel loafer and send it flying toward the back of Keith Olbermann’s head today as he walked through the MSNBC commisary.
The cordovan leather missile grazed the Countdown host’s left [...]
Leaked: Keith Olbermann’s “To Do” List
Found by a cleaning lady at MSNBC studios . . . a piece of executive-sized stationery with the initials K.O.
To Do
__ Browbeat the interns.
__ Call the Dale Carnegie people. Demand refund.
__ Check Daily Kos threads to find out what the kids want to hear tonight.
__ Repeatedly stab photo of Bill O’Reilly muttering oaths and curses.
__ [...]
Chris Matthews’ Leg Stunned, Excited to Learn They’re Now Selling Senate Seats
“What the heck!” the excitable appendage was heard to yell from a makeup chair at MSNBC studios this afternoon. The head had just been briefed about the arrest of Illinois Democratic governor Blagojovich for, among other things, attempting to auction off President Elect Barack Obama’s vacant Senate seat to the highest bidder.
“There are guys who [...]
Sometimes a Leg Just Wants to Run
Chris Matthews’ Leg has a fever. And the only prescription, apparently, is . . . more power and attention.
Thus, Chris Matthews is planning to run for the United States Senate.
If you’re a manic bloviater who considers the sound of his own voice a rare and beautiful gift to all mankind, and deems every thought that [...]
